Lessons: Careful What You Wish For

When I was pregnant I had many "when you're older" conversations with my belly.  These consisted of things I wanted him to experience, things I wanted to do with him, things he'd be allowed to have, etc.  Because I was fairly certain he would be an only child I thought about extracurricular activities.  Would he like to join a sports team at a park?  Maybe he'd prefer some sort of martial arts.  Or dance.  Or chess!  Then I thought about how I'd react to these preferences, if there were any I'd object to.  Some women eat pickles and ice cream, I talked to my growing abdomen, to each her own.

I Am Not A Father

Every year I get the same thing from various people and while I do understand and appreciate the sentiment, I find it a bit insulting.  As always, it's my personal opinion and to each their own.

A mother is a female and a father is a male.  To me, that is as far as the distinction goes.  To say a mother is special because she carried the child diminishes the role of females who have adopted children or who have willingly taken on the responsibility of a child not theirs.  To say a birth mother is more special than an adoptive mother or step mother is insulting at best.  And where does that leave the father?  Is a man less of a father because he does not share any genetic material with the child?

Is He Just Bad?

I don't like to introduce my child, either in person or in conversation, by stating he is autistic.  I feel that it is only one part of who he is and does not need to be mentioned any more than his obsession with Legos or trains need to be mentioned.  But just like Legos and trains, it does come up sometimes.  And when it does I have often been asked if I am sure he is autistic, could he just be bad.

This is where I take a deep breath and remind myself that I am a civilised human being.  In my mind the answer goes something like this:

I Blew His Mind Away

The other day my son was sitting at my desk, next to the kitchen, as I was preparing him a sandwich.  He began singing a song about the months of the year that I remember singing in Kindergarten so I joined him.  His little eyes lit up and we sang the rest of the song together.  When we were done he asked me how I knew the song and I told him that I used to sing it in Kindergarten too.

3 Years, 12 Months!

I know, it's been 18 days and no big birthday post.  It's just not happening this year, much less than last year.  It's just too hard this year, I cannot accept it.  From his fitting into 4T pants, to him insisting he is 5, to this sudden expanded vocabulary and expressiveness.  It's just too much.  I need my baby!!!!!!!  Or get knocked up again... but that's a post for some other place.

Anywho, here is the synopsis of the celebrations:

Trip to the Park

A trip to the park.  All pictures, no explanation needed.

The 'New' Playroom

It's 1:30am.  WTH am I doing up at this time??  Cleaning, that's what.  Hurricane Nicholas came through today will full force leaving behind a disaster zone that makes Katrina look mild.  These past couple of days have been rough, he's been acting way out of character for him and by the time he is in bed I have been too exhausted to attempt cleaning up.  Today I had a little extra energy, we had a surprisingly ok evening after his nap, so I went to work before FEMA has a chance to try and 'help.'  

Cleaning up, while it took almost an hour, was a breeze!!  All thanks to my new set up and system (yay!).  I didn't move too much of his things around but did take out my bookcases from the playroom (aka living room) which has left an incredibly nice space.  Moved a couple of things around and I have been incredibly satisfied with the result.  And since insomnia has kicked in, I shall tell you all about these changes.

Painting Fun!

The latest creations from my little artiste!  Don't look too hard, it's abstract art :P

This started as the Island of Sodor.  The green is the island

and the blue is the water.

The Play Kitchen

I just spent about 30 minutes picking up various play kitchen accessories.  And while this is not the first time, and not going to be the last time, I find myself thinking about why I got him this kitchen and (the very few) critics of my decision.  As I pick up I do not mind one bit.  It's one of those things that was a great decision.  Now let me tell you why (because I need positives today) :-P.

While I don't want to raise my kid genderless, I do believe in not holding him to his perceived gender.  He does have the boy trains and trucks and dinosaurs but he also has the girl baby doll with bottle.  He talks about castles and is currently obsessed with the colour pink.  The kitchen seemed to me pretty gender neutral.  Go to any restaurant and you'll notice most of the cooks are male.  On TV most chefs are male.  And if cooking was really such a 'girl' thing then men living alone would starve.

His kitchen